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I'm sure there is a thread about this on here, but I would have to dig for it, and that sounds like a lot of work. So that being said, lets hear these horror stories! Allow me to start..

I wanna say this was around 2010. I was single, living my best life at the time. Good jobs ( I worked two), made some damn good money, and was in the best shape of my life. So I'm at home one night, and got a friend request from a VERY good looking girl. So I accept and immediately start chatting with her. Eventually, after making sure she wasn't hiding any skeletons in her closet, give her my phone number. I worked a TON of hours at the time, so free time wasn't in abundance. So lots of texting, quite a few night calls, and a few weeks go by, and I have a night off. I decided to take this girl to a nice Italian restaurant in the town she lived in. Place is called Tony's, and I had been there quite a few times. So I pick her up in my work truck, because this was winter, and I wasn't about to dare get salt on my freshly painted Mustang. Right off the bat, she insults the truck. It was an 91 Ranger, that was my grandfathers. So that kinda rubbed me wrong. Anyways, we get to Tony's, get a table, and start our conversation. Typical first date talk, when the obligatory "Why are you single?" question comes up. I kept my answer simple. She however, did no such thing. 45 minutes of telling me about her ex, with tears welling up in her eyes on more than one occasion. I should have got out of there then, but if I'm being honest, I hadn't gotten laid in like, well let's say a while. So we get done eating, go sit at a bar nearby, and have a few drinks. I order beer, she gets an appletini and a shot of tequila. So at this point, I realize she is either trying to get hammered, or trying to erase something. After a couple hours at the bar, I tell her that I needed to get going. Had a long day ahead the next day. So I drive her back to her apartment, and she invited me in for, and I'm quoting this, "nakey cuddles". Whatever, lets see how this goes. We make it in the door and both land on the couch. After about 10 minutes, she is naked, and we will say, giving a very nice "mouth hug". Then I hear a door open. In walks her best friend, and HER KID!! Never mentioned a child, or the fact that we MIGHT get interrupted, but did that stop her? Absolutely not, she just keeps going while I'm trying to squirm away and get my damn pants back on! She gets very upset that I'm stopping things, but it was very awkward when her best friend acted like it was fucking normal! Bailed out halfway through oral, and blocked her number in the parking lot of her apartment...

And the girl following that, was an almost bigger horror story, but that's for another day...
 

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One that sticks out was the one avoided at the last minute due to my online detective work. Met her on bumble I think back in 2018 or 2019, cute blonde with an especially hot bikini beach picture. In her photos she appeared around 5'8" and 140lbs. This chick is hot to trot and messaging me like crazy so I set up a date for the following Friday. Then the red flags, I gave her a compliment and she thanks me and says she doesn't get many of those. WTF? I go back and scan her photos again - these are good, but shit, maybe they're old. Beach pic, light goes off.

Uhh when was your last trip I ask. I dig a little and she unknowingly lets me know beach pic is from 2011 in Hawaii. Hmmm, something still feels off. All I knew was her first name and she was a manager for "big tech". I dug and dug and found it. Her being interviewed in a youtube video (no I wont post it) and she was ALL OF 350lbs, the huge gut, triple chin etc.

I canceled the date and told her to better represent herself
 

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Paragraphs guy.....
 
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More of an unforgettable than a worst date.. Back in my 72 K5 Blazer in my yute, getting ii on with a redheaded co-worker. Took a couple days to get the stink out of it.
 

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One of my worst ones was a girl I met on yahoo chat groups back in the early 2000s. Of course the pic she sends is an older pic. I hadn't been on a date in a while, so I drive to Atlanta (about an hour and a half). Meet up and she is about 100 lbs heavier than the pic she sent. I'm a nice guy, so of course I went on this date with her, but the whole time I couldn't get past being lied to.
Was walking at the planetarium and she steps right over a snake. No clue. Dumb bitch. Never talked to her again.
 

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Really the only bad date I ever went on was in college. A friend set me up and this girl ended up being an 11 out of ten. For whatever reason I totally choked and just didn’t have much to say and pretty much blew it.

She wanted to go out again but I never bothered calling her back. I saw her after college and we both had a great laugh about it.

The only thing that made me feel better about it is her husband came home early to surprise her one day and busted her cheating on him.

We had a college get together a few years ago and despite the fact that she is now 54 she’s still literally a 10. Natural blonde with the perfect face and body. One of the few women who looks just about the same with or without makeup.
 

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Had a first date with a girl who called 2 friends to join us for dinner where I'm then told all men are scum and it sort of stays on that topic as she talked about her ex. Then I got stiffed with the whole bill... 4 of us head to a piano bar where the 3 of them get smashed drunk and we get "asked to leave" when they start doing Karaoke over top of the lounge act and then set the table on fire trying to do flaming Sambuca. Of course she pukes in my car on the way home, and on her front porch and in her doorway and on her dog. I do the hair hold thing for a while before cleaning her up as best I can without assaulting her and then pour a glass of water down her throat and put her to bed. Then I cleaned up the house, and the dog. I called her the next day just to check on her. She partially remembers the evening but clearly remembers that I was boring. She called me a week later wanting to know why I hadn't called her to go out again

Another first date... She keeps me waiting for an hour with the truck running (-25c). When we do leave she's not happy I brought a truck and I should have "rented" something nice - and besides - she only dates guys with BMWs (and I'll have to get a BMW. Her dinner reservations were with her parents !! Who promptly grill me about life, my willingness to give my soul to Christ and when I will be converting to the Evangelical church. Then they ask about my ability to support their daughter (1st Fucking hour of the 1st Fucking date !!). On the way to the lounge afterwards she's giving me shit for "something" I did wrong then pulls out a vile of coke and takes 2 hits off her wrist... Nope... Not happening... Not in front of me or in my truck... She gets angry with my objection to her "casual drug use" and demands I let her out of the car - which I do - in -25c - while she's wearing a skirt and a jacket that won't last very long. When I get home 30 minutes later, there are a bunch of messages from her on the machine (No cell phones back then) and she's runs the gambit from angry - to apologetic - to bargaining (Best BJ ever) - to begging me to come get her. Turns out she waited for me to come back then walked to a phone booth and started calling. She eventually called her parents and then waited in a heated bus shelter with some homeless folks until they showed up.
 

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So far all these "stories" are copied and enhanced from Penthouse 1980 except for "stinky pussy" (aka: Holy Mackeral) post #7. :LOL:

Worst "date" I ever had was in 1971 when I went to pick up a girl I met at a bar and when I walked into her parents house 10 minutes later a car pulls up and she looks out the window and says: "Oh no! Tell him you are here for my sister!"……. I knew right there things were going to be bad.
A minute later in walks three guys stinking of liquor and they proceed to beat my ass for going out with this chick……. Thankfully I got out of the house with a bloody mouth, sore body and ripped shirt. Needless to say I was pissed and never went back.
Basically I got fucked with my clothes on!
 

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I have a lot of stories just as most of you do, here is one.

Around 1979 or so I was working at Eastern (since 1977) and a co-worker and his wife that knew me well asked me to meet her friend and I was willing to meet any female at that time because all I wanted to do was lay pipe and that is what her friend wanted too!

So I ride my motorcycle to her familiies house, knock on the door and she invites me in, she is pretty enough but has dirty feet so that is the first turn off. She asks me if I want something to drink and I said sure, some ice water would be fine, she takes a glass out of the sink that was full of dishes and puts some ice with water in it!!!

I make my exit Stage Left!
 

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Had a woman tell me she was just looking for a man to take care of her financially. She was dead serious and unashamed.
Had the same thing happen. Told her I had to take a leak and did the ol' duck and dive lol....

The worst though has to be a woman I went out with and she was a looker. So much in fact that it was the first time everyone in an IKEA store was staring at her and me (probably thinking WTF lol.) Anyhoo we ate in their little Restaurant. On the way back to Richmond the Ribs she ate weren't working out. Gassed out the damn interior, but I chocked it up to life. Then it escalated to some Ninja shits and we got caught in a traffic jam. No where to run and I think you know what happened next. I tried to be understanding as Shit happens but she went off the deep end. Dropped her off, cleaned the hell out of my 4runner the next day, and called it a wrap. She was a huge step above my paygrade in the women department but damn if she can't laugh about that then you gotta go. Good pussy or not lol....

JW
 

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Ribs at IKEA..no wonder she shit in your car… :ROFLMAO:

WTF..I must live a sheltered life..did not know that was possible..
 

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I've only really had one bad date (if you want to call it that). And I got it over with when I was young. I was 17 and just got my first car, a 73 Camaro and of course, it was my pride and joy. I arrived at an after graduation (high school) party in town, and there was this girl I had been flirting with for quite a while at school. She was a little tipsy from the keg beer so I made my move, and before you know it we were in one of my favorite parking spots, in the back seat, and getting naked. Well, not too long after we began steaming up the windows and I was laying some miles of pipe,...she puked that keg beer right on the rear floor of my Camaro.

I was pissed, took her bra and panties and used them to clean up as much as I could, threw them out the window and drove her home as fast as I could. Needless to say, I was shampooing that rug the next day and was dousing it with cheap cologne for a while until the smell went away.
 
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I've only really had one bad date (if you want to call it that). And I got it over with when I was young. I was 17 and just got my first car, a 73 Camaro and of course, it was my pride and joy. I arrived at an after graduation (high school) party in town, and there was this girl I had been flirting with for quite a while at school. She was a little tipsy from the keg beer so I made my move, and before you know it we were in one of my favorite parking spots, in the back seat, and getting naked. Well, not too long after we began steaming up the windows and I was laying some miles of pipe,...she puked that keg beer right on the rear floor of my Camaro.

I was pissed, took her bra and panties and used them to clean up as much as I could, threw them out the window and drove her home as fast as I could. Needless to say, I was shampooing that rug the next day and was dousing it with cheap cologne for a while until the smell went away.
WELL……… Did you "finish the job" before the quick wipe down?🤮
 
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Good stories ;)
Maybe this one is better out than in.
Not much of a story- I'm not a lady's man. Back in the late 90s- buddy sets up a blind date for me to go with him and his girlfriend to the PNE in Vancouver. So I drive down to Surrey from Burnaby- say 40min, we meet, she's NOT impressed, stares out the side window the whole time we drive to the PNE and can't even be civil to me. We do the exhibition thing me and buddy hang out, she and girlfriend disappear for the evening. Years after the fact I still don't know why I didn't just bail and WALK the 40min home- painful and embarrassing evening.
 

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WELL……… Did you "finish the job" before the quick wipe down?🤮
Actually yes....we had just finished....well...I had just finished anyway, lol, and that's when all that motion of the ocean must have gotten those draft beers stirring.
 
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