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Here's a dildo....I'm watching sportscenter.
 

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1) shut your fucking mouth for a little
2) why is there more trash in your car than in the garbage in the garage?
3) there is no fucking sense in washing and drying clothes if you don't put them up
 

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your mamas ride home
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Good Lord woman, get to the phucking point.
I have said this numerous of times. Goes right over the head like a soft breeze on a spring or summer day.

Beginning, middle, end and nothing else. I don't give a shit how she felt before she had an Experience. Or what color her shoes were she had on or the fucking weather report. Just tell me the fucking short short version and none of your details. Jesus H christ I want to eat a bullet!!!!

Why are women incapable of being direct and to the point???
 

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Told an old girlfriend to have a tall, cold glass of shut the fuck up.


She reminds me of that whenever she's pissed off at her new husband.:-D
 

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This is Susie and JoAnn, and you're sleeping on the couch!
A buddy took a chick home from the bar and told his old lady "Bitch, this is your replacement". The poor girl went running out the door since she didn't know he was married. Next day his lunch was made for him to take to work and the house was clean when he got home.
 

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A buddy took a chick home from the bar and told his old lady "Bitch, this is your replacement". The poor girl went running out the door since she didn't know he was married. Next day his lunch was made for him to take to work and the house was clean when he got home.
Im calling bullshit
 
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