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my boy is 7 months and still havent been peed on. the wife got it the first day.
My daughter did crap on my hand when she was a baby though.
 

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More than once by both boys when they were babies and poop'd on once while changing a diaper.not too funny at the time but funny as hell looking back.
 

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Being the only male in the house, I'm the only one that pees on stuff...
 

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Was laying flat on my back holding my daughter up like and airplane and got Hot milk vomit right in the face. Thought the wife was going to stroke out laughing.

Daughter is a nurse and worked a pediatric office for a while in collage. The joke was not if but when you get pied on. They learned to always cover that thing with a cloth diaper cause it's ALWAYS loaded. Some thing about the cool air sets it off. They would laugh because the little farts would grin and grin when they got one!!

The joys of parenthood!!
 

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FUCKING ASSHOLE SINCE '61
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my boy is 7 months and still havent been peed on. the wife got it the first day.
My daughter did crap on my hand when she was a baby though.
In the delivery room, oldest son came out and promptly peed on Doctor.....it was funny.

Second son's changing table was right by window, any cool breeze,
pee on Mom.
After the second time, she would automaticly drap a clean diaper over his equipment.......
Problem solved.

Your Pal, Gary
 

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Was laying flat on my back holding my daughter up like and airplane and got Hot milk vomit right in the face. Thought the wife was going to stroke out laughing.

The joys of parenthood!!
My wife knows how this is. I was up with our daughter for 2 hours one night, wouldn't stop crying, wouldn't sleep. Wife wakes up and says here let me try, she didn't have her for 30 seconds before she yakked right in her face. Took everything I had not to laugh.
 

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my daughter puked on me and 3 other people. We were getting on the bus to the airport from our hotel at disney. She just had a look on her face and puked, then turned her head while it was still coming out. she still tells people about it. "i threw up on 3 people in florida"
 

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We bought something like in the link below. Got ours at Baby's R Us i think. It was a really neat idea, but as others said a washcloth actually was easier and it seems with age the "sprinkles" get fewer and farther between.

http://www.uncommongoods.com/product/pee-pee-teepees

The one we bought was in the link below. It was called a Weeblock. I just happened to see it and bought it on a whim one day.. Didn't really use it that much as he seemed to fade with that fad....

http://www.toysrus.com/buy/portable-changing-pads-sets/sozo-weeblock-oops-wee21-3012862
 

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my daughter puked on me and 3 other people. We were getting on the bus to the airport from our hotel at disney. She just had a look on her face and puked, then turned her head while it was still coming out. she still tells people about it. "i threw up on 3 people in florida"
Was that your daughter in "The Exorcist"? Nice Nice Nice.
 

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One time is all it took for me. Always, always have the junk covered. Otherwise you will be cleaning piss off the ceiling, walls, his face, your face, your eyes, clothing........
 

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I've not been pee'd on yet.
Son pee'd all over the wall once when I was changing him though. If you can dodge pee, you can dodge a ball!!!

I knew from the get go to throw something over that thing as soon as the diaper came off.

Wife has been pee'd on by both my son and daughter though. lol
 

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And I call you dipshit.
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My son is 5 1/2 weeks old. I've been pissed on, had my hand shit in, and he puked down my shirt.
But he's an awesome baby, not fussy, sleeps all night, only threw up when we switched bottles. So a few bodily functions on my hand are a fair trade off.
 

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When my son was born, C Section, he came out pissing all over everything in the operating room including the doctors.
 
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