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A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, “What are all those clocks?”

St. Peter answered, “Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move.”

“Oh,” said the man, “whose clock is that?”

“That’s Mother Teresa’s. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.”

“Incredible,” said the man.

St. Pete continues, “That’s Abe Lincoln’s clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that he only told two lies in his entire life.”

The man asks, “Where’s Obama’s clock?”

St. Pete replies, “Oh, they keep that one in Jesus’ office. He’s using it as ceiling fan”
 

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I was thinking helicopter. That thing would have some lift!
 
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