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Boosted Fredneck
2,417 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
A virile, middle aged Italian gentlemen named Luigi was relaxing at
his favorite bar in Rome when he managed to attract a spectacular young
woman. Things progressed to the point where he led her back to his apartment
and, after some small talk, they retired to his bedroom where he rattled her
After a pleasant interlude he asked with a smile, 'So, you finish?'
She paused for a second, frowned, and replied, 'No.'
Surprised, Luigi reached for her and the rattling resumed. This time
she thrashed about wildly and there were screams of passion.

The sex finally ends and, again, Luigi smiles and asks, 'You finish?' Again, after a short pause, she returns his smile, cuddles closer to him and softly says, 'No.'

Stunned, but damned if he was going to leave her unsatisfied, Luigi >
reaches for the woman yet again. Using the last of his strength, he barely manages
it, but they end together screaming, bucking, clawing and ripping the bed
Exhausted, Luigi falls onto his back, gasping. Barely able to turn
his head, he looks into her eyes, smiles proudly and asked again, 'You finish?'
Barely able to speak, the woman whispers in his ear, 'No, I Norwegian.'


Boosted Fredneck
2,417 Posts
Discussion Starter #2


1. Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model:
"I wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan' all the kids to copulate me."

2. New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season:
"I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.."

3. And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the 'Skin's say:
"I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl,"
Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too."

4. Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins:
"He treat us like mens. He let us wear earrings.."

5. Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann:
"Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

6. Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh :
"I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.."
(Now that is beautiful)

7. Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach:
"You guys line up alphabetically by height.."
And, "You guys pair up in groups of three, and then line up in a circle."

8. Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson going to prison:
"Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton .."

9. Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker:
"That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes."

10. Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regimen of heavyweight Andrew Golota:
"He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning, regardless of what time it is."

11. Chuck Nevitt , North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice:
"My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt. (I wonder if his IQ ever hit room temperature in January)

12. Frank Layden , Utah Jazz president, on a former player:
"I asked him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?'
He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'"

13. Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D:
"Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject."

14. In the words of NC State great Charles Shackelford:
"I can go to my left or right, I am amphibious."

15. Former Houston Oilers coach Bum Phillips when asked by Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips,
Phillips responded: "Because she's too damn ugly to kiss good-bye."

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